Author's Notes: The Emperor's Dream Chapter Eight

Hello and welcome to my author’s notes for chapter eight of The Emperor’s Dream! These shorter notes are my reactions to the chapters that I have posted, as well as some fun facts about the writing process. So if you like peeking behind the curtain, or if it’s helpful to hear how another writer looks critically at their writing, read on! If that’s not your cup of tea, don’t sweat this one. See you next week with chapter nine.

If you haven’t read chapter eight yet, you can read it here.

If you just saw “The Emperor’s Dream” and you had no idea what I was talking about, no worries! It’s my ongoing epic fantasy novella that I’m sharing a chapter at a time here on my website. You can read chapter one here. These are first drafts only, so the final published version might change a little or a lot, but hopefully you either enjoy or learn something from seeing the process.

Now on with this week’s author’s notes!

• I think Meisun comes across a little too hysterical when Wanyi, Yishan, and Fahyo show up. Obviously, she should be concerned, but I think the words “She cried” hit a little too hard, when it could just as easily be “said” or “exclaimed.”
• I’m not sure how I feel about Yishan’s hidden talent here. On the one hand, as a spymaster, it would seem right for him to be able to play a part well, but now that I’m re-reading it, it feels a little cartoony. Yishan is just a lot more intense usually, so for him to be this overly polite caricature feels weird. Wanyi thinks so, too, which is good, but it might be a bit too far.
• “It was only a start, but it was a start.” Any Wheel of Time fans out there? Just me?
• When I have scenes where characters are talking for awhile, I worry a little about falling into the “white room” problem, which basically means you don’t establish the scene well enough and readers picture the dialogue happening in an empty white room. For me, even on a re-read, I didn’t think about it much, since Wanyi had gone to The Enchanted Shanty earlier, and for myself, I have a pretty good idea of what the shop looks like.
  • Other than pacing, I think this is one of the biggest dangers for scenes with lots of dialogue, and it’s really hard to tell as a writer when you’re falling into it. What do you think? Did the scene feel natural to you? Were you picturing Wanyi and Meisun and the others in the shop, somewhere else, or were they just disembodied voices in your mind?

I think that’s all for this week, friend! What questions do you have? I’d also love to hear your feedback. Let me know your thoughts!

And again, if you haven’t read chapter eight yet, you can do so here. That’ll make this whole post make a lot more sense.

If you’d like to support the work I’m doing here, you can buy me a coffee here. Or, if you’d like to become a monthly supporter, you can do so by becoming a paid subscriber on my website. Whatever floats your boat. I’m grateful either way. See you soon!

Until next time!